8 Tips to Help a Grieving Child

The death of a loved one is difficult. We’re grieving and so are our children. Often the loss of a grandparent, great aunt/uncle or other elderly family member or a pet is the first experience children have with death. We cannot protect our children from the pain of grief and loss. However, we can help children cope by providing love, security, and compassion.

When telling children about the death of a loved one, be honest. Use simple language and answer questions with short explanations. Try to be calm, even though you’re grieving too. Encourage all family members to express their feelings.

8 Tips for Dealing with Grief and Loss

1. Explain most people die when they are old, not young, to calm fears.
2. Keep the child’s routine consistent including school, bedtime, and mealtime.
3. Allow your child to play. In a child’s world, play is an appropriate outlet for emotions.
4. Regression (accidents, bed wetting, thumb sucking, sleep issues) is common.
5. If your children are attending the funeral service, prepare children for what they will experience. Have a trusted adult available to take the child from the service if they are agitated and you cannot leave.
6. Maintain family traditions, especially if the death occurs close to a holiday. Consistency and tradition are healing.
7. Notify the staff at your child’s school for support and compassion. Children may express their grief in uncharacteristic behaviors.
8. If the family pet was euthanized, avoid using “put to sleep” as children may fear bedtime.

Within the context of faith, we have the gift of knowing death is not the end. In heaven, there’s no disease or sadness. Jesus provides a forever place for us where we will see our loved ones again. The books listed below will assist you in comforting your child and pointing to the truth of the Bible.

Recommended Resources
God Gave Us Heaven by Lisa Town Bergren & Laura J. Bryant
Heaven for Kids by Randy Alcorn
Tell Me About Heaven by Randy Alcorn
What Happened When We Die by Carolyn Nystrom
Someday Heaven by Larry Libby 
Heaven is for Real for Kids by Colton Burpo
After the Funeral by Jane Loretta Winsch               
God is Always Good by Tama Fortner

© 2022 Becky Danielson. All rights reserved.

If this post is encouraging, please take a moment to subscribe to the Faith First Parent e-newsletter or share the post with a friend.

Photo by Tadeusz Lakota on Unsplash