First Friends: Encouraging Positive Sibling Relationships

Top Ten Tips for Encouraging Positive Sibling Relationships

“Home is where the heart is.” Hopefully…

How many times have you heard that adage and felt like it’s not necessarily your house at the moment, this week or even this year?

There are few greater things than to have family members that are not only civil to one another, but actually love each other and like being together. Unfortunately, we all tend to save our worst behaviors for the ones we love the most. Home life is not always peaceful, happy or even congenial.

So how do we encourage our kids to be friends with one another?

Top Ten Tips for Encouraging Positive Sibling Relationships

1. Always expect the best. Parental expectations play a tremendous role in how children behave. Keep the bar high in regard to sibling relationships.
2. Make a list of attributes your family values. Expect each member of the family to live up to the expectations.
3. Institute a team mentality. “All for one and one for all” worked for the Three Musketeers. It works for families too. Be trustworthy, helpful, and encouraging. Solve problems together.
4. Avoid comparisons. Each child is uniquely created. Comparing kids leads to rivalry.
5. Train kids to share. One day the child will need to share with a roommate or spouse. Home is for practicing.
6. Forgive easily and accept forgiveness.
7. Serve others and accept assistance. Serve those less fortunate as a family. Train children to ask and be willing to receive assistance with homework, chores, and other tasks.
8. Listen well and keep confidences. Use good communication skills (eye contact, affirmations). Listen without multi-tasking or jumping in to solve the problem.
9. Make family time a priority. Plan Family Fun Nights to enjoy each other’s company.
10. Love unconditionally, always and forever, no matter what.

Relationship lessons, how to get along with others, solve problems, practice friendship skills, and resolve conflicts, are all acquired one way or another at home with parents and siblings. How well the lessons are taught and modeled is up to us, the parents. Just as Mom and Dad’s relationship is the model for marriage, sibling interactions lay the groundwork for future friendships. Sibling congeniality, it’s a gift that will keep on giving for years to come.

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Copyright ©2017 Becky Danielson. All rights reserved.